As November rolls on, Thanksgiving approaches, bringing with it an overflowing cornucopia of cherished traditions such as cheek pinching by older relatives and turning two-dimensional hand tracings into refrigerator-worthy turkeys. But the real meaning behind this most American of holidays is, of course, being thankful for all the blessings we too often take for granted.
So to help give kids some handy ideas on what to say when they’re asked what they’re thankful for this year, we present:
The top five things kids are most thankful for this Thanksgiving:
5. I am thankful for the internet for giving me a way to prove to my cousin that Kevin Bacon was not in Frozen.
4. I am thankful for my dog, whose willingness to eat anything allows me to make Brussels sprouts disappear without incident.
3. I am thankful for turkeys, not only because they taste delicious, but also because they are easy to draw, and they make adults take a nap for a change.
2. I am thankful for pilgrim hats because there’s something about having a belt buckle on a hat that makes absolutely no sense, and that’s just wonderful.
1. I am thankful for the new University of Iowa Stead Family Children’s Hospital opening in 2017, because as Iowa’s only nationally ranked children’s hospital, I know they can treat anything, maybe even my mom’s overcooked turkey.